Did I pray hard enough?

2 Tim 3:16-17 "All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.

I am not a bible scholar nor do I play one on T.V.  I'm a simple girl trying to work through some HARD stuff.  I don't pretend to know all the answers (well... okay, maybe I do sometimes).  All I know is that the word is all I need to understand who God is.  He has written down all I need to know about life in Him, so it is there that I turn when trying to work through all this "stuff."  It is there where He will reveal himself to me.  So, that's where I turned when trying to find out another "what if."

4/23/07

So what does that mean if God can change His mind with our earnest prayer? What does that mean about Jack? Does it mean that had I or Daniel or even someone else prayed harder, we could have saved Jack?

Well, first I have to look at God’s character…. God is good, just, loving, and merciful, He does not hold our sins against us anymore when we live covered by the blood of Christ. So, would God use my lack of prayer against my precious Jack or me?

I also have to look back at the times God changed His mind in the past. In Exodus He changed His mind in the severity of His punishment on His people because of Moses’ prayer and to fulfill His promises to His people. God will always keep His promises and He does not promise me that He will not take any of my children or that I will not suffer… quite the contrary. 

(Numbers 14: 11-23; 2 Chronicles 29: 3-10, 36; Jonah 3: 1-10)

So, God’s mind changes as a response to changed conditions? God will never answer a prayer with yes that is outside of His will. So, our prayers must conform to His will and must be within the character of God.

So, what does Jack’s death say about the character of God? Romans 8: 28

How can Jack’s death benefit me? Well, it isn’t just about me. Remember Isaiah 57: 1,2 God saved JACK from “evil days ahead.” As his mother should I not rejoice in that? I mourn because I loved Jack and I miss Jack- this is okay. Even Jesus mourns. John 11:35 He wept for their loss. AND Jack’s death HAS benefited me… I have grown in my spiritual walk, my prayer and my understanding of prayer, I have seen others point their eyes to the cross, and I know there are many more blessings to come. But, I still weep for my baby and that is okay.

So, I am convinced that the death of my son was within the perfect will of God and therefore I could not have changed that.   Further more what does it say about what is MOST important to me if I would ask God or expect God to act outside of His perfect will? Is what glorifies God most the most important thing to me?  That is a hard question for a woman mourning the death of her son... very hard.